BlackDave.org – Divide and Conquer

Hey guys.

I’m off from work for the next 2 days. I’m sure you don’t really care about my life, but the other day at work, I received a hefty titl-a-whirl backbreaker from a series of customers over the shittiest laptop we’ve carried in my Best Buy tenure. Here’s a scenario: 3 men, 2 women, a kid who looks like a really short Fred Durst and his shouldn’t be that hot, but is hot just because her life sucks and she isn’t atrocious , girlfriend were all ready to Angle Slam me because I sold out of the computer moments before their arrival. Fuck you. Get a better computer. I don’t wanna be Angle Slammed, Ankle Locked, fucking Chokeslammed, Tombstoned, Pedigreed, any of that shit. Not the kind of thing I go prepared to work to do.

Anyway, I wanted to tell you guys about something that I’ve recently been getting stoked about: prints. Yes, they’re basically posters, but prints are better. Why you ask? I don’t know…because they aren’t posters. Anyway, your favorite hardcore band E.V.A. is in the process of possibly getting some done and here’s one that I’m really digging:

If you click the picture, it’ll take you to our online store.

Anothr really cool one is one that my friend Carlos, ygtnha(you’ll get to know him as) Gran’, made. It appears that he’s trying to do this thing called “Come One Come All”, and here’s his first print related to that:

You can click on the print to go to his online portfolio of all of the different shit he does. Talented dude. Follow him on twitter if you want @xGran.

I haven’t talked about the new tablet phenomena that’s been poppin’ off lately! So, Archos came out with a tablet that’s running Google’s operating system, Android, on it. It’s pretty terrible. It’s a fantastic idea, but the way that Archos twisted and restricted the system, the tablet sucks for anyone who’s a legitimate enthusiast of the brand and the operating system. I have played with it a bit and it would have been fantastic, had Archos kept it open. After that failure, I decided to place my faith in Apple’s tablet venture. It was announced a couple days ago, and it’s called the iPad. iPad!? EW! What a terrible name. I’m glad everyone is calling it MaxiPad. Keep it up. To me, it’s a big iPod touch with programs redesigned to suit the size of the thing. Nothing super sick about it. No camera, not solar powered, can’t run multiple apps or anything! A lot of people I’ve talked to have expressed disappointment in the item, even a few pretty hefty Apple fanboys. I guess we’ll see. It should be out in March, I feel.

That’s really all I have for you guys. Guess I’ll toss you another picture related to a female?

@tayallday

Peace.

Hey guys.

Did you know that apparently the appropriate way to say 2010 is “twenty ten” and not “two thousand ten”? I like to say “two k x” or “two thousand ten”. Weird. I even write “2kX” on official documents. Yes, OFFICIAL ones…like leases and loans and shit. At the bank, they asked me what year it was, and I politely informed them that I’m clueless, but that I’m going to take a stab at it and say it’s the year of the goat. They weren’t amused. That’s alright though. People at work complain about me because I speak a foreign language. It’s not foreign, it’s called American. American is the best language, the only thing that’s fucked up about it is that everyone in this country speaks it, just not the same. Shit is pretty funny, you can get on the phone with someone and have no clue what they’re talking about but in English it’s the most basic shit ever. You know what I’m talking about.

So, let’s talk about some 2010 things poppin’ off. Firstly, my boy Carlos, aka Gran’, is going to putting out his first real mixtape next month. It’s gonna be pretty good. Kid’s really good at what he does and is driven to make the shit happen. Anyway, shit is called “Gran’ Opening” and, in normal mixtape fashion, it’s a mix of him over beats of other songs and some original tracks as well. I’ve heard a good bit of it already and it’s hot. Find him on MySpace and on Facebook(click the word for links) Here’s the intro track for you guys, and a peek at the album cover:

Gran’ – Gran’ Opening(Presale)

Secondly! SECONDFUCKINGLY! The best band in the sunny state of South Carolina, known to you by 3 letters, E, V, and A, has finally received the physical copy of their EP, known as the Manfiest DestinE.P. We’ve placed it online so that you guys can purchase them through those means. Here’s what the cover looks like and one of our songs, called “All Girls Are Sluts”. If you click the cover, it’ll take you to our online shop:

E.V.A. – All Girls Are Sluts

Thirdly, and I suppose lastly, I’m going to try and do all sorts of cool shit to my website throughout the year. I need a new theme and favicon for starters. I’ll work on that favicon probably tonight. Hopefully I can come out with something awesome.

Did you guys hear about that crazy earthquake in Haiti? Like a 7 on the Richter scale or some shit. Decimated the place, apparently. I heard that America is thinking about bringing some of those people over here. I say thee NAY! Haitians are crazy as fuck, and that’s word. I have a hard enough time understanding America as is, as well.

A few more things before I depart: @officialKat is awesome, Jersey Shore is the most addicting show of 2010, SierrEmerge is probably gonna date me soon(don’t ask questions).

Alright. Later.

PS – There’s this new anonymous question answer thing called formspring on the internet right now. I’ve got an account, and I, of course, was an OG to it: CLICK HERE to ask me anything you want without me knowing who you are. It’s a beautiful thing. I answer ALL questions, too.

Good morrow! How does the world turn for you guys today? Hopefully at it’s same ol’ pace. You know when you’re having a shitty day, or even a fucking awesome day, and time moves at a weird pace? Hopefully neither of those things are going on, because a day at a normal pace is long enough, and a day that went by too quickly is a wasted day. Mind games are bullshit.

You guys remember that band that I’m in that you always try to make fun of? We’re the shit. Our EP, The Manifest DestinEP, is getting pressed currently, and we have more tee designs on the way. In case you haven’t heard us to make fun of us yet, here’s a link: http://www.myspace.com/evah8. I mean, I’m just sayin’.

You know what my favorite letter of the alphabet is? J. It’s J. You know what letter I want to write about on here? Fucking Z. Z is such a sick letter. The reason I can’t down with z is because it doesn’t have enough followers. When niggas were making words, they were like, “All the vibration on my tongue from the zZzZzZ sound make my tongue numb, and that shit ain’t cool.” Apparently once the ceremony was over, people were starting to notice that they have a whole page of text without a Z in it. It’s pretty ridiculous.

Speaking of ridiculous, no one should ever say “ridonkulous”. Thanks. For all of you who are unsure what that means, I got my good friend UrbanDictionary.com to help me out:

Ridonkulous

An adjective to describe something that is worthy enough to be called exceedingly preposterous that is deserves an even more absurd name than ridiculous.

Person 1: Oh my god! Did you hear that Ashley Olson is dating Lance Armstrong?
Person 2: That is absolutely ridonkulous, he’s got cancer! Who the fuck wants to date someone with cancer?

I edited the example a little bit. Whoops.

Speaking of cancer though, my boy Carlos, aka Gran, rapped over a song I’ve never listened to and shit is hot. Link? You’re looking to listen to it? I got that! He’s the second dude on this track: Fed Up(Freestyle).

Do any of you guys listen to powerpop at all? I fucking don’t, but I have some friends, mostly girls, who do. I’ve been to many a powerpop show and the people there are so friendly and you’re never sure if the girls there are flirting with you or not and there’s always that one fat girl who’s really tight with the band and thinks she’s really hot but actually isn’t and the dudes who are there and sing along like they are feeling the fuck out of whatever the guys in the band are saying when nine times out of ten they were previously in a failed hardcore band and just want to try to make money or hop bandwagon then they remain local forever and their lives suck and on top of that…ON TOP OF THAT…I have some friends who just recorded a song, I guess they’re in a powerpop band and are looking for a vocalist. So if you love any of those things or think that I’m ridiculous for posting such a run-on sentence, or actually like the music and can sing…fucking listen to it and hit them up. The band is called Avery Lane and here’s their MySpace link: CLICK HERE!

So here’s a little recap of the post today: E.V.A. Gran. Z. Avery Lane. Ridonkulous. Why aren’t you listening to Brand New? Totally rhetorical. Don’t answer.

Alright. Later.

OH FUCK! Here’s a picture of @SierraVE. It’s not that new…she’s been a bit busy, so she hasn’t been able to send me awesome exclusive pictures to use lately. Still love you, Si…but……………………..step it up. Show me your hearts, babygirl. Uhhh…what?

Later.