BlackDave.org – Divide and Conquer

Hey guys.

Happy Hallmark holiday. I don’t have much time, but I wanted to make a post today.

Follow @revrunwisdom on twitter. It’s some inspirational shit.

Aight. Later.

Hey guys. I just realized that Valentine’s Day is coming up. 2010 is my year, so this year…I’m taking Sarah Silverman out for dinner. Buying her a big ass Jewish ass teddy bear.

Big ass Jew ass teddy bear.
And dinner.
I’m hoping she’s gonna want to make out as well.

Good d8, amirite?

Peace.

Hey guys.
I’m not even going to try to tell you what Valentine’s Day actually is.

I was scoping out Urban Dictionary today to find out that people who post on there are the ones who hate the holiday more than anyone. I think that they hate it just about as much as Michael Cera was hatin these niggas in the next video:

And if that ain’t hate, then I don’t know what to tell you.

I hate Valentine’s Day too. Why? Not because I never have a girlfriend on the day, but because I’m poor and even if I wanted to take myself out, I couldn’t. You know when niggas are all like “I’m gonna take my boo to the fuckin movies and dinner and shit and then I’m gonna wear that pussy out!” Wear that pussy out? Like you’re gonna wanna fuck a worn out pussy after it’s initial wearing? BAD IDEA FELLAS! BAD FUCKING IDEA! I don’t even like to wear green tee shirts out and you wanna wear a pussy out!

Fucking idiots.

I made this girl a mix cd for the holiday though. Click the album art to download it:

And in case you were wondering what Valentine’s Day meant to the niggas who are hatin it out there:

1.Valentine’s Day

AKA International ‘crying and masturbating’ day.

It’s Valentines Day, so I’ll have a little wank and a little cry.

2. Valentine’s Day

Just another dumb holiday to make single people feel like second-class citizens.

I HATE Valentines Day. Every year its the same thing, “I’ll have someone next year” or maybe “see what next year holds” or “you will have someone real soon.” Bla Blaa Bla. Hell, I’m almost 30 and still alone. It all makes me sick.

3. Valentine’s Day
Named after an early christian martyr named Valentine, it is the one day where people who have no chance of getting with a girl in any way shape or form realize that fact even more…
also, the really lonely people’s mothers say they will be their valentine because they know their son it pathetic

Eli Manning – It’s Valentine’s Day again and nobody loves me. Especially since the Giants robbed the Pats of the superbowl win.
Eli’s Mother – It’s okay, honey. If it makes you feel better, I’ll be your valentine.
Eli Manning: *sniffles* Okay.

Please download that mix, too.
It’s not awesome, but I bet there’s something on there that you may not have heard before.

What’s good?

I’m just sitting on the couch watching that Toy Machine skate video “Good & Evil”. Just in case you care.

Speaking of watching shit, I watched the movie “The Warriors” the other day and it changed my life. What movie changed you life? All a nigga named Dave is trying to tell you is that he prolly couldn’t kick your ass on a normal day, but if I had on a Warriors vest and maybe a tank top with a pair of Levi’s and some Dunk Lows that I would ruin your day. Fucking fuck your shit up. Now I know your thinking, that makes no sense, but just in case you have any fucking doubts:

So, because of what you just saw, I’m calling some niggas out:
A) graphic designers: I want a fucking awesome logo for my gang
2) Gangsta ass niggas: Who will wear this shit everywhere
C) Pussy ass niggas: Didnt you read the title? You can wear em too!
D) Bitches, Hoes, Tricks, and any other type of female degrading their gender: ROCK MY SHIT!
E) Ladies – Y’all too! Why put a ring on it when you can put a jacket on it?

And speaking of Ladies, it’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow. At what point do niggas need to do extra shit to let women be like “I guess that was alright.” Lucky for y’all, I dont take girls seriously, because I’ll cut a bitch. Ask my ex-girlfriend Michelle. I cut her. Why you ask? Oh, you didnt ask?
BECAUSE A BITCH WAS ACTING DUMB AS A BITCH! That’s why it’s called “dumb as a bitch”. What it should be called is “dumb as Sega’s advertising”, because every Sega system was the best shit ever! THE BEST fucking SHIT fucking EVER! I dare you to tell me a bad Sega system. I know Game Gear had shitty battery life, but it’s all good. Shit was ill. Don’t make me rant about that shit, because…I would and could. If you need it, just request it.
As I was saying…you need to either get a fucking Twitter or fucking Latitude or fucking…something.
Oh, and if your Valentine isn’t Asian or Sierra Emerge, you’re a fucking faggot.

Someone get me some strawberry ice cream or banana Nesquik or XxX Vitamin Water.